The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure

Have you ever noticed how some men are seriously into their dick? Like, it’s all they think about when it comes to getting off? The penis tends to hog the stage when it comes to experiencing sexual pleasure. Well, move over dick, because there’s a whole other world from the balls beyond.

I’m seeing an exciting trend among my male friends – more and more of them are starting to explore their bodies beyond their penis.

Granted, my friends are sex-positive for the most part, which means they are more open-minded than most of mainstream society.

But now, there’s an easily accessible guide for anyone interested in learning about the pleasures of the prostate. This book has been long time coming – it’s been 15 years since “Bend Over Boyfriend” video series planted an edgy seed. We’re making progress – more men are open to talk about it and ask questions.

Called The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, it’s billed as an erotic exploration for men and their partners. You can buy the book on Amazon or Good Vibrations.

Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian

Authors Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian gleefully reported, “Our partners listened to us geek out about the prostate for months.” Yep, that’s what happens when your partners are passionate sex educators. It’s nice for the prostate to get some props for a change – usually all you hear about it is when it becomes cancerous.

Charlie and Aislinn have done a fantastic job compiling all the info into an easily accessible guide. I HIGHLY recommend it. It would be pretty awesome for a couple to read it together. In fact, this book and a beginner prostate toy would make an extremely thoughtful gift.

(more…)

Teen Pregnancy & Prevention

Here is how to ensure teenagers get pregnant and STIs:

- shame and scare them

- refuse to educate them

Sooo… how about we not do that?

Our society is obsessed with sex, but for the most part, mainstream culture either avoids frank discussion about sex, or it sensationalizes it in an unhealthy, negative way.

Children find this mixed message very confusing. ADULTS do, as well!

Many people are working hard to infuse our country with an open, honest sex-positive message, myself included.

As a mother, I was keenly interested to learn of a performance piece featuring a teen/parent sex ed theme hosted at The Ethical Society, a welcoming home for humanists with the motto Deed, not Creed, and sponsored by a local organization called Teen Pregnancy and Prevention Partnership.

I attended the program with my 12-year-old daughter.

(more…)

Ed Note: My friend posted this on facebook the other day:

“So anyone who is close to me knows that I have some very strong opinions about the way modern society portrays the female genitals. One aspect of that topic is ‘cleanliness’, or the idea that the female anatomy is somehow naturally ‘dirty’ or ‘smelly’ and therefore women need products to help ‘correct’ the problem.

I found this Summer’s Eve ad in a magazine today and I almost screamed.

This is not OK.

Don’t forget your ‘V’ this valentines day’???

Fuck you, Summer’s Eve. Fuck you for building an industry around making women feel terrible about their bodies and their sexuality, and for pushing ideas and products that are actually counterproductive to vaginal health. And fuck you for implying that I need to go ‘wash my gross vagina’ before I let someone near it this Valentines Day. I invite anyone to share this who is tired of being told they need to douse their genitals in floral perfume to be considered worthy of attraction or physical affection.”

So, I’m sharing it.

(more…)

Ivanyi, Lovers, 1909

In the past three weeks, I’ve had three men approach me for a consultation about a problem they’ve been dealing with for longer than I can fathom: their wife is chronically ill, and they haven’t had sex in years. They’ve cared for her, support and love her, would never leave her, but they are frustrated. Drained.  They aren’t getting their needs met. They feel guilty. When I ask if they feel resentful, they immediately say no, but…

What should they do?

What would YOU do?

Are you partnered with someone who is ill?

Are you ill and partnered?

Are you getting your physical and emotional needs met?

Is your partner getting their physical and emotional needs met?

Are you monogamous or polyamorous?

How do you cope?

(more…)

Note: This article was originally published here.

Adult male virgins often feel shame and anxiety

Not every woman in their late 30s can say they devirginized four men in one year. I can. Over the course of several months, I spent intimate time with four adult male virgins, from 24 to 38 years of age. Two had overwhelmingly positive outcomes, and two did not.

The Good

As a sex surrogate and sexplorer, I have a philosophy when it comes to people, places and things: Leave them better than you found them. That is always my goal. When I’m in bed with someone, I want them to feel amazing and very special. Despite my best intentions, however, it doesn’t always work out that way.

Virgin #1 was a 38-year-old man with a dismal track record in the bedroom. He went to bars to “pick up chicks,” but would shut down as soon as he got them home. He’d give them oral sex, all the while sweating bullets as he feared letting them down, which in his mind, he did. He counted on alcohol to cloud the evening, mumbling about “whiskey dick” as he sheepishly showed them the door. Finally, he decided enough was enough, and he sought professional help.

I spent a couple hours talking with him about his issues, which was one key to solving them. Having it all out in the open was a relief to him—it was good to be on the same page instead of hiding his insecurities like porn under the mattress.

We then spent a couple hours in a very open and honest setting—he felt safe and understood by me, which was such a contrast to his past experiences. He was getting to the point where he was feeling like women were adversaries, to be feared.

He had successful intercourse with me for the very first time. He was amazed—it felt so right and spectacular. “I can’t believe I’m doing it!” he kept muttering incredulously in my ear as he pushed awkwardly in and out of me.

The sessions he had with me were a breakthrough with him. He found that women are not scary creatures, and went out into the dating world with newfound confidence.

(more…)

Note: This article was originally published here.

What’s in your pants? Can’t wait to find out!

I don’t know about you, but I love surprises.

You never can tell what a man’s penis is going to be like just by looking at him. I’ve hooked up with a 6’4” guy with huge hands and feet, only to discover he has an average size penis. I’ve been shocked to find out the 5’7” Asian man with delicate features is a show-er, not a grow-er.

The other day I met with a new client, an attractive, fit 34-year-old. Usually, I get a clue what’s on a client’s mind prior to meeting him, but in this case I had no idea what his issue was. This appealed to me. I was going to get a surprise.

The Long and the Short of It

We met at a coffee shop, and took a walk in the park. Settling down on a bench, he took a deep breath and nervously admitted that he felt his penis was too small. When I asked him why, he cited two main reasons:

1. A girlfriend in high school drunkenly mocked him, telling him he had a little dick.
2. His current girlfriend cheated on him with another man.

When he asked her if the other man had a bigger penis, she’d told him yes. As horrifying as this was for him to hear, he confessed that ever since then, he has enjoyed fucking her with a large dildo and imagining he is watching a well-endowed man pleasure her as he feels he cannot.

He told me he avoids being around other men in the locker room obsessively, and that he was finding himself getting more and more into a fetish called SPH, or small penis humiliation.

(more…)

You know, I never thought I’d get the chance to anally fist someone. Who does?! I haven’t even vaginally fisted anyone yet, although I’ve been fisted thrice, and it was nice!

Anyway, I found out that a friend of mine is into anal fisting, so I asked him if he would let me put my hand up his ass.

He said sure. He gave me this mini-tutorial:

The rectum is much like the vagina, only with more defined muscle groups.  those groups need to be slowly stretched at first.

Because I am male, this may take some effort, but that is part of the fun.  You will worry about hurting me, don’t worry.  Use lots of lube, start with one, then two fingers and keep adding more and more.  Be sure to pull all of the way out from time to time so the muscles will relax.

Each new insertion will be easier than the previous. After some time you will notice a sexy type of looseness that is different than anything you have ever felt.  When you hand is finally in, go very slow at first, this gives the muscles time to relax even more.  This is not the time to hurry, just get used to the tightness and warmth.

On the next insertion you will go in much easier and it is then that I will let you play any way you want.  I will be in heaven at that point and will want you to take full advantage of your new experience.

You would never guess by looking at him that he was into this kind of thing. He’s very manly, brawny. I asked him how he got into such extreme penetration, and he told me it all started when he was 12 years old and his 19 year old, well-hung brother raped him.

Seriously.

(more…)