I would believe ..some... creepy people can be cured. Social skills can be learned. However, most just try and jump right in with no rhyme or reason when they feel a few positive vibes and think its "in the bag". By the way, that walking steak comment was fuking hilarious.

I really loved your response of the definition of a creepy guy. A lot of creepy guys whine that 'Ohhh I'm creepy because she doesn't like me but if some hot guy did the same thing it would be totally okay. Women are shallow blah blah blah'.
Can creeps be cured? That I'm not sure of. None of the ones I've encountered were. I have a channel on youtube and it really brings the creepers out to play. I think if a creep were to be cured, it would have to involve some sort of special attention, therapy, or tutoring in social skills.

There is a simple explanation for all of the behaviors you describe: shyness! Well, shyness mixed with horniness and inexperience.

I probably fit the "creepy" category here and there because, gasp, I try to be respectful to people I don't know very well!

I'm a little cold around strangers...because they're strangers!! And that's not gonna change even if I want to fuck them.

Note also the mixed cultural signals that guys get in this department. On the one hand, you're creepy if you hit on women. On the other hand, you're a loser if you're too "nice" to make a move. The struggle between these two things, which can often come off as awkwardness or nervousness, probably has a lot to do with that "creepy" impression.

Don't get me wrong...there are definitely creeps out there who want to chain women to their water heater. But the vast majority of these guys simply want to get laid but are nervous about getting rejected or seeming like an asshole.

Forgive me for sounding bitter...I haven't been laid in a long time, and the women I fall in love with almost unerringly put me in the friend category.

Oddly enough this behavior is not only confined to men. I am sure it is more common in men but I have experienced it with women as well.

I would have a really tough time defining creepy. TBK, your definition's great. I have to say that while a lot of times its probably explained by all the things you mentioned, there's something to be said for trusting that instinct. Most women who've been attacked say that they just got a bad vibe but didn't listen to it. Listen to it.

Swedishskier, I am trying really hard to resist responding to your snarky comment with snarky comments. Nowhere in that comment did I express what you said I expressed. I'll just leave it at that and suggest that you read the words I wrote and not what you think I wrote.

Let me rephrase my comment to be clear. Being bad at meeting people of the opposite sex is not a moral failing, and people should be nicer about it. That doesn't mean you should fuck somebody you're not attracted to; just don't treat them like they have some nefarious intent. As is the philosophy of this website, people want to get laid, and that's normal. Some people are good at that. We should be happy for them. Some people are bad at that. We should feel compassion toward them.

If I was calling for a change, it wasn't from individual women. It was from a culture that gives contradictory messages about how a single guy should interact with women.

Haha..thanks Shannon. That was so nice, I think I'll let my slaves escape from my dungeon today!

I did have a situation lately involving a "creepy" woman. It's too long to tell, but she started hounding me a little bit on Facebook and a messageboard's PM, then getting very pissy when she noticed I had read my message but not responded. (For the record, I had pulled the message up on my iPhone, where I just read things and respond to them later.) Two of her messages (calling me stuck up or whatnot) was three hours apart.

I didn't respond to any of them because 1.) I wasn't remotely attracted to her, 2.) her messages was very, very strange and there wasn't anything (open question, etc) to respond to, and 3.) anything I said would have said would have fanned the flames and come off as offensive, so I felt it better to remain silent.

I dated a guy for just under two months, and he was definitely creepy. It was more the obsessive behavior and unending clinginess that creeped me out. For instance, I'd drop him off at work and by the time I drove the 10 minutes back to my apartment I'd have a voicemail and at least two text messages from him. These weren't the short "I miss you and can't wait to see you" messages, but ones that often had to be split into two messages because of length. Or, he'd send me a pic of his cock....which he took in the driver's seat of the cab he drove. That creeped me out more than anything.
A week into the relationship he told me he loved me. A month into it he told me he wanted to marry me. A month after that, I left him. He threatened to call the cops on me when I didn't give him his stuff back after a couple of days (it was finals week and I was also working). He called me a liar, a slut, and all sorts of nasty words.

To me, anyone whose presence makes me uncomfortable is creepy.

Creepy and shy are definitely unrelated as far as I see it.
One of the main differences is shy guys take heed in signals; creepy men disregard the signal and push forward.

Beast is right....I HATE the asshat that chases my face for a kiss...or anyone elses for that matter....it's So creepy and wrong!!!

Gods do i have stories!!! I'm fired up here... have to collect myself and share a bit.....god i hate hate hate hate covertly hostile creepy men.

My current boyfriend came off as a huge creep when I first met him. He was a friend of a friend and I met him so he could buy booze for me. But then he was IMing me a lot and pushing for stuff I just didn't like him enough to be into. He's the nerdy type, but certainly not unattractive.

But I'm dating him now, right? I watch him interact with other people, and he does come off as really creepy when he talks to girls.

So in some cases, it is just shyness. He's respectful, charming, and witty once you get to know him, but for some reason he loses all social grace when talking to a new girl. His posture changes, his tone changes, etc. He looks really guarded. When you talk to him, all that makes something feel.. off.

I'm trying to teach him to be aware of that stuff (he didn't know that his shyness had a perceivable effect in the other person). Chicks are trained our whole lives to be hypersensitive to strange men. We rarely if ever talk about creepy chicks we've met not because they don't exist, but because they almost never register as an actual threat to our safety.

So I think *most* creeps can be cured if they have someone around who can point out what they're doing wrong, like if they're becoming guarded, being too friendly, not noticing "back off" signals, etc. It takes a lot of work and self-awareness and practice to change that kind of thing, but it can be done. Treat it like a bad habit, not a disease.

Obviously, some men really are dangerous, but they don't always register as creeps. Charming, attractive, witty men can be some of the most dangerous.

Good topic, I happen to specialize in destroying creepiness in guys. I'll give the short response...most of the stuff on my blog also addresses increasing social skills if anyone is interested.

Guys get creepy because, as one commenter said above, they have no social skill. I call it "game," as in having no game. When they have no game and are introverted and have never experienced success with women, they turn into weirdos. Kinda of like Golem in Lord of the Rings.

One solution is to learn game and follow the path that many many social artists (ie pickup artist) has followed. That is, read the material, practice in-field, go to camps and get your body language and voice and clothes etc etc straightened out, go to the gym, and work on your REGULAR LIFE so that you're an interesting and well rounded individual. After all that, creepy guys chill the fuck out and the women will follow.