Kinky Stories & Relationship / Sex Advice

I check your web site every day. My husband tunes in. We find it to be incredibly interesting and completely different from the sex blogger atmosphere. We find it to be real and not some shock talk to get you off. It is real and vivid situations.

And I envy the liberated feeling I get from this web site. lol

Please continue the good work and move forward on your own terms!

And I am a Pisces, film obsessed, book obsessed, foodie, happy owner of a dog and
cat, wife and marketing rep.

Yes, you are a goddess and a woman who lives her life with more authenticity then most can even imagine!

TBK your a human being, lol, just like everyone else, you want to be accepted and loved like we all do, your a special person a provert(you passed pervert a long time ago)lol.

Don't sweat the petty stuff you have a great man a good kid, friend's and family who love you, what more could anyone ask for.

you have experienced a lot of fucked up shit because of who you are you are just you, TBK.

There are two kind's of people who will give you shit and talk bad about you, the stupid and the envious just remember that.

as for the sex blogger calender and ACLU (i have never liked those fuck's) fuck em.

as for what you are? you are The Beautiful Kind.

Phoenix

What are you? That's a great question. You're the person who writes her experiences daily and provides a vehicle for others to do the same.

I think I understand what you're saying about not being a Sex Blogger, as that seems to be a manufactured persona designed to help the reader get off from reading their content. Sure there's some of that in your writing, but there's also the encouragement to get out there and do it yourself, whereas "sex blogger" is all about Me, Me, Me.

That bit with the NY Sex Blogger Calendar is pretty fucking goofy. "Sexual Freedom" *snort. The only way you could have misrepresented yourself is if you said you lived in NY.

From a social stand point, the hardest thing to do these days is find your tribe. We've all fragmented out from the standard base, and now identify with our very specific niche, that "The Other" simply does not belong. You can join my group of people who don't fit in anywhere. So far, it's just me.

You are only 3 years into the long journey of becoming an "overnight sensation" and you are entering a new phase. It's morning so I don't have any practical advice other than keep doing what you're doing and look for that secret straight gig.

It's great that you've written an e-book. Perhaps you can find someone to illustrate it with some lush illustrations.Or perhaps someone can illustrate or turn into smutty comics pieces from "my first..." Just a quick and dirty idea for the moment.

What are you? You're awesome!

Who am I? I'm the Cap'n. Apparently my ship has no rudder.

*applause*

Keep up the good work, keep writing, keep informing, stay true to yourself.

Cheers!

I don't care what the sex blogger community thinks of you! I've found your posts on sex enlightening, interesting, and enjoyable. It is refreshing to find anyone who "puts it out there" the way you do. Keep up the good work!

I think you are a smart and beautiful women who is fearless in what she is willing to discuss. Your devotion to being open and honest no matter what is refreshing. I love this site and I am always thrilled to talk to you. Don't let anyone change that.

HA! I love it!! Sorry, this makes me laugh. Why? I am a Goddess. I practice and teach Tantric living. After spending a year in AZ studying and training I came home and began teaching and reaching out to the local Tantra community. Needless to say, I was TOO open for the other practitioners in the area. So I completely resonate with being rejected in a community that is SUPPOSED to be open minded and free.

Keep honoring yourself in everything. The rest is just a means of defining who you are and who you are not. And it seems that is exactly what you have done with this experience.

Namaste'

I don't really read sex blogs. But I read you! I guess that's confirmation of your new self-identity.

And I'm really happy that you keep finding ways to be true to yourself amidst all the bizarro pressures of your life. Onwards and upwards!

In the words of Henrik Ibsen, "the strongest man is he who stands alone."

I'm actually enormously disappointed to hear how you've been treated of late, though I Confess to being completely unaware. I've been sex blogging for about five years, and I have to say I am not surprised. I think taking this sort of intellectual separation from the paradigm is a great help. As you seek to define your new identity, I wish you the best of luck. You're doing the right thing for all the right reasons. Integrity is too valuable a thing to compromise.

Too controversial? Are they reading the same blog I am? Or do you have an alter-ego that goes around punching little old ladies instead of helping them cross the street? I can only assume that to be the case. Shame on you.

regardless of what you call yourself you remain a trusted and valued contributor to our common work. i think those of us who don't fit in; who rumple the undies of those who think they are in charge should get extra credit...or at least a gold star for their performance.

and you, my dear, are a champ. keep it up and don't take any shit. a whole bunch of us are counting on you.

go get 'em tiger!

You are an inspiration. There's no need to fit yourself into a niche or box yourself into one particular word.

You are you - creative, inspiring, humorous, incredible, brave, daring, and above all, unique.

Don't pigeonhole yourself.

Not to add to your confusion of self identity, but...Not a journalist? jour·nal·ist n.: One who keeps a journal, writing material of current interest?? Not a therapist? But, you are so therapeutic and help so many. Whatever you call your contribution to the world wide web, may you continue for a long, long time. Not fitting in? Fuck em all (not literally.)

I am so confused. How could you not be the right person for a calendar on sexual freedom?

Love the Blog and Love you and your style! keep it up!

Not a part of the “sex blogging community”… hmm. That makes me wonder what their criteria is for membership. It can’t be that a member must write about sex in a meaningful, thoughtful, and inspirational way. Exploring insights into the acts and feelings of sex cannot be on the membership form. Community creation and interaction with the readers of a blog cannot get you into the “sex blogging community”. Introspection and self-inspection are not the path, it would seem. You cannot gain entry by being honest about your relationships with people, lovers, and companies. Well written articles filled with love for the experience and love for sharing the experience seems to be a disqualification.

What’s left to get you into the fold? Maybe instead of creating a community, the trick is to attack someone for something random (like an affiliation with a product or company). Could it be that in order to fit in, you must hide any and all seediness of being paid for writing? It may be that, to be a member, you must not taint yourself with actual experience and insight. Like the anthropologist, you must divorce yourself and only observe, and rely on the consultations of others. This is the way to get accepted.

There are two “sex bloggers” that I read; you and Dan Savage. I’m not as sexually open as you and I’m not gay. However, the humanity, intelligence and insight that these two views give me, I feel, makes me see things in ways I wouldn’t have before. Because of this, I have the opportunity to become more than what I am today. You’re insights may not be applicable to my life but I’m not stuck with only my point of view. I may not agree with Dan Savage on all his advice but when I find myself judging someone… his voice may be what keeps me from making that mistake.

Thank you for your help.

What am I?
I am alone but not lonely.
I am broken but unhurt.
I am ignorant but learning.
I am today but will be tomorrow.
I am chad.

I've always been a fan and I think you are inspiring and beautiful. Your positivity is contagious!

It's interesting to me that a community that spends so much time writing of tolerance, sex positivity and acceptance of those who don't fit into society's definition of "normal or acceptable" can so easily find someone who embodies all they preach to be "too controversial."

I would like to say that I am not at all surprised, but I actually am. It's a bit like someone saying cupcakes are not cake.

In the end, whether or not you qualify to be a member of the "sex-blogger" club hardly matters. Your blog will continue to outshine most.

TBK, I have been following your struggle for a while. In fact I was listening in on the web-radio cast where you had to defend your writing for EdenFantasys and I thought to myself, why is the host condemning her?

Listen, the bottom line is, be who you are and do you want to know who that is, well I'll tell you. You are a Mother, a Lover, a Friend, a Daughter. You are a fantasy, a Sexy Sex goddess, you are My Wet Dream, you are a Muse, you derive from the source of pure creativity.

Who am I... I am your servant, I am your lord, I am the Angelic presence in your twisted sexual fantasy, I am watching, I am playful... I am Master, I am CASTIEL!

I've never considered you a sex blogger. I started reading your blog a long time ago, when sex was just one of many topics you wrote about. I've stuck around because I like you and your writing. You write mostly about sex, and I have no hangups about that -- sex is good for ya!

The manner in which you lost your job is becoming more common and accepted -- and that pisses me right off. It strikes right at the kind of country we pretend to be, when someone who writes *anonymously* about her private sex life stands to be fired because management is spying on its employees.

The fear of sex, sensuality, and the body itself (we live in an era where public officials sometimes cover up classical nude figures) has also touched my own personal blog. I posted a picture of my 2-year old son who merely *appeared* to be naked, with naught but his shoulders and knees showing below his smiling face, and I got an onslaught of protests about imagined pedophiles crossing the country to hunt us down, and imagined threats to my teaching career -- all of it groundless and based in terror over what our country has become.

Because it has become something pretty terrible. Happy 4th.

You are so many things to me. Love and Respect to you my QueenSlut. I am here.

Oh, I'm back because I forgot to share my own experience with the ACLU. Several years ago, in southern California, I applied for an executive assistant position at their Los Angeles office. I was well-qualified for the job, embraced their mission, and was eager to work for them.

At my second interview, at which the leadership of that chapter were present, I was asked about the Zen Center jobs on my resume. Was I a Zen Buddhist? Yes. Did I meditate every day? Yes. Next question: how could a meditator expect to keep up with the pace of a busy office?

That was the freakin' ACLU. They may be in the "civil rights" biz, but it's just another goddamn corporation.

You are inspiration. You give me hope and I thank you.

I like sex and don't understand why we are taught it is evil or bad or that we should feel bad for liking sex and wanting more sex... with our partner or with others outside of our committed relationships. You inspire me to believe that I'm not alone in my thinking and I relish every opportunity to read your writings.

I am honored to call you friend.

I am silly, funny, serious, sexy, understated, overrated in my own mind and have a little crazy mixed in for good measure. Aren't we all?

I think of you as a Sex Explorer, boldly blazing a path through the kinky jungle of all that is sex related. A kind of travel writer who with her trusty companion, Beast, reports back on the sights, smells and people of far-away exotic places. You cheerfully travel to places others only dream about going. Then enthusiastically detail your adventures aboard.

Sometimes the destination is the point; sometimes it is all about the journey. We do so love reading all about your travels. Through good weather and bad; may your adventures never end.

My wife introduced me to your website a couple of weeks ago.

It has added openness and "spark" to our sex life.

To be blunt, you are an idealist. Idealist are individualistic. They are ego driven, which, contrary to the opinions of the world, is a good thing. Individuals hold their ideals above the ideas of society.

They see a better path to follow than that followed by the lumbering heard. The heard "hates" individual thought for that makes the individual "uncontrolable"

Openly communicating your ideals is what the collective fears most of all.

Every problem you have described, and are encountering, is "typical" with individual achievers.

Sometimes the "mob" will gang up and try to harm the individual. Osterization is the standard, and only tool of punishment they have.

Ignore it.

Instead, be blinded by the visions of realizing your ideals.

Being osterized is not a problem for the indiviualist, so long as he / she does not compromise their ideals, values, and goals.

This is the essence of the classic struggle of individual idealist versus the collective.

Love is complete surrender to one's own perfect, uncompromised vision.

Never let go of your vision. To do so would be to let go of self.

So what does it mean when an avant garde portion of the net/society, like 'sex bloggers', are so institutionalized and prescribed that they shun someone like you? Just how does that thought process work?

IMHO, most of the people writing/talking about sex have little life experience, even less travel experience (abroad), are mostly consumed with their clique - what Johnny or Jane did last weekend -, and throw in a dash of shockjock hyperbole for good measure - 'cause that's how this genre works, etc.

There's a lot of vacuous drivel out there - and I mean 99% of the stuff - that's little more than introverted, crotch gazing with a 'buy this' button.

PS - This is the reason why the "submissive", in reality, is the one in control.