By Kendra Holliday | January 27, 2018
So many men are sick from toxic masculinity in our society. They have to be very manly, which involves taking care of business, being in charge, hiding feelings, and burying their feminine side.
They crave a place where they can surrender to a strong woman and be awash in female energy and power exchange.
Here’s a Dan Savage podcast where a man wants to know how to get his vanilla wife to like domming and pegging him. Go to the 8:35 mark and listen.
Dan points out that for some women, this can feel more like work than fun, so he suggests backing things up. For a woman not used to being sexually dominant, a good place for her to start is to think about what she wants right now and demanding it.
But what if what she wants right now is a cup of tea? Will that disappoint her partner? Will taking small steps like this lead them to a place where they both feel fulfillment?
I get a lot of men who tell me, “I want to please you.”
But then, when I tell them what I want, they steer things back to what THEY have in mind.
If you want me to peg you, piss on you, sit on your face, objectify you, humiliate you, that’s totally fine! You’re hiring me to perform a service, and I am happy to oblige. I have so much fun being creative sexually!
But don’t get it twisted. Are you doing this for you, or are you doing this for me?
Prepping for a session takes work, so not only are you paying for the time we are mentally and physically engaged, but you are paying for the hour before and after. I have to dress up in uncomfortable lingerie and heels and get into the right head space. I have to clean up afterward.
If you REALLY want to please me, here are some ideas:
Go down on me for 20-40 minutes (not “for hours”, or “all night”)
Rub my feet and know what you’re doing. So many men give foot rubs that feel absent-minded.
Get me a manicure or pedicure. Either you do it, or hire someone to give me a spa day.
Make me tea.
Do my shopping.
Mop my kitchen floor.
Clean my bathroom.
Scrub my dungeon.
Clean my sex toy cabinet.
Read to me while I take a bath.
Contribute toward my travel and continuing education.
Organize my shoes or lingerie. Thank you, David Wraith!
I got you, boo. pic.twitter.com/oR741trVot
— David Wraith (@davidwraith) January 19, 2018