Junk in Your Trunk

By Kendra Holliday | February 1, 2017

You know how they talk about baggage, being in the closet, etc.?

Everyone has baggage – daddy issues, mommy issues, family pain, abandonment issues, trust issues, inexperienced issues, break up trauma, secrets, shame, guilt, neglect, abuse, loss, betrayal, injury, fear, rejection…

I like to pretend our head is an attic, and our brain is an old fashioned trunk, crammed full of stuff we’ve collected from our travels.

What's in your trunk?

What’s in your trunk?

Space is really tight, and the stuff is jammed in there.

So, I propose this exercise to my clients.

Find the key that opens the trunk.

A skeleton key, for the skeletons in your closet

A skeleton key, for the skeletons in your closet

Open that trunk up.

Now, take ALL the stuff out of it – toss it around the room.

Examine each article – is it a piece of clothing? Is it a toy? Is it wrinkled? Is it moldy? Does it still fit? Do you want to keep it?

Address and assess each item. Acknowledge why it’s in your trunk, and decide if it’s something you want to hang on to.

If you want to keep it – if it’s infused with good memories or lessons to be learned, fold it neatly and place it back in the trunk.

If it’s something you’d like to get rid of – if it no longer serves you and is weighing you down, decide if you want to recycle it, trash it, or even burn it.

Ritualistic

Ritualistic

By the time you’re finished, your trunk should be lighter and better organized. This will be helpful as you continue your journey.

This metaphor and symbolism comes in handy for me often – for instance, my molestation by an older brother is an ugly, stained nightie I’ve thrown away many times, but it keeps finding its way back into my trunk – every time he contacts me or my mom brings it up.

One of these days, I’ll FINALLY be rid of that nightie and have closure.

And someday, the entire trunk will be gone altogether. If you know what I mean.

So take care of your trunk while you still have the chance! Don’t let it weigh you down as you continue on your journey and encounter other people.

You are just passing through – make it easier on yourself, and travel lightly.

Comments

shady 2015-08-11 15:04:59

Beautiful.
I’ve learned recently that our minds are just tools. Too many of us think of our minds as ourselves. Instead of using our minds we have let them take over! They run us.
I strive for the complete understanding that my body and my mind are tools for me to use; to be able to direct them to my advantage, rather than letting them run me.
This post has reminded me again that my experiences don’t have to define me.
I am not what happened to me. I am not my body. I am not my mind nor my thoughts.
I used to tell my daughter when she was little that love was the most powerful force in the universe. Love makes the world go round.
Somewhere along the way, I forgot.
Thank you, Kendra, for the reminder!

Reply

Stephen 2017-02-10 01:28:50

Another excellent recycled post.

Of all people, Tammy Faye Bakker used to preach this exact same thing.

She used to say ‘If you carry a dead body around on your back all the time, eventually it’ll infect and kill you, too. Put that body down and you’ll feel lighter and more free. You don’t need to carry all of these burdens with you. It’s okay. Forgive them and forgive yourself for letting these things go.’ (obviously I’m paraphrasing).

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