By Kendra Holliday | November 28, 2013
When I first shared this story six years ago, I thought it was super badass. When I read it now, I think, what the fuck? Did I really do that? Um, trigger warning? This took place in the early stages of our relationship. We were exploring BDSM, our limits, each other…
I’m on the rag.
Matthew tells me to wait for him in his bed. I’m wearing a tampon, panties, and nothing else. I’m curled up all soft and warm, and wake when he comes home from another late night of carousing. Whiskey and manscent fill the room. I hear him shedding clothes, his heavy breathing. He climbs into the bed, and embraces me. I sigh contentedly and wiggle into him…
He smells blood.
He starts pawing at me.
“I thought you said we were going to cuddle,” I say in a small voice.
“FUCK YOU,” he growls in my ear, and starts yanking my panties down.
In the back of my mind I realize that’s the name of this game, and it’s time to face the music.
He crushes me with his weight. He is so big, easily two or three times my size. I feel like a sparrow pinned to the grill of a truck, the engine roaring and hot.
As he works me over he recites the following, like gravel and steel, in my ear: “I KNOW YOU NEED TO SUCK DICK BECAUSE YOU ARE A FUCKING SLUT. AND SINCE I LOVE YOU, I’M GOING TO GIVE THAT TO YOU. I’M GOING TO INTRODUCE YOU TO ALL MY FRIENDS. BUT YOU’RE GOING TO BE ON YOUR KNEES. AND YOU’RE GOING TO BLOW THEIR FUCKING MINDS. YOU WILL BE MY GIFT TO THEM.”
I shudder and squirm as I soak up his dirty nothings, and then –
“YOU’VE GOT FIVE SECONDS TO GET SOME LUBE,” he orders in my ear, and you better believe I run and get it. I bring it back to him, and he squirts it on his hard dick like ketchup on a hot dog.
He rudely probes, pushes, seeks my tight little asshole like a heat seeking missile. I don’t think I want to be fucked in the ass, yet I don’t use my safeword…
He splits me in two. I scream.
He groans and mutters in my ear, grabs me by the throat. He saws in and out of me. It fucking burns.
Then he pulls out of my ass and tells me to suck it.
In the dark I make a face, but I obey. I put it in my mouth, it’s red hot and sweet from the lube. He tells me to use my hands, rub his balls. He’s fucking my face so hard that I’m gagging and drooling. A pool of spit forms on his belly and I’m gasping for breath. My hair is snarled, and what isn’t gathered up in his fist is stuck to my face.
“YOU LIKE WHEN I FUCK YOUR ASS AND THEN YOUR FACE, DON’T YOU?” he sneers.
I hum a helpless little affirmative.
Finally I escape from his clutches. I pull away, Beast roars, and I stumble to the bathroom. I rinse my face and reach for a towel. He looms behind me, bends me over the tub…
“FUCK IT,” he orders.
I push against him.
He grabs my hips and thrusts ruthlessly into me, fast, hard deep. I’m blindly grabbing at the rim of the bathtub. I feel his balls and my tampon string slapping against my thighs. I start screaming, guttural, like a banshee. “FUCK!” I scream, to whoever is listening.
No one is.
Finally he groans and dumps his load in my ass. “THERE IT IS,” he hisses, pauses fully inside my ass, then pulls out.
I think I’m done with the pain, I’m a trembling mess, but all of a sudden he wallops my ass so hard that his cum splatters out. I’m completely shocked.
He beats his cum out of my ass.
I’m soiling the bathmat, I’m embarrassed. I stammer as much, and he says, “GOT ANY MORE?” and whales on me a few more times, emptying my ravaged bowels.
“YOU FUCKING DIRTY WHORE. IT’S TIME TO SHOWER.”
He steps over me and throws on the taps, then drags me by my arm into the shower, thrusting me under the spray.
Then he starts pissing all over me, he points up, aims at my face, splashes my torso and neck with his hot piss.
I’m shaking so bad, I sink down and curl up in a ball and he sneers, “WHAT, YOU GONNA CRY ON ME NOW?”
“NO!” I choke out, angry. I’m a sopping wet cat. “My ass hurts!” I whine.
“JESUS CHRIST, I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOU WHINING” He hauls me back up by my arm, “YOU’VE HAD ME UP ALL FUCKING NIGHT, DO YOU KNOW THAT? DO YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH WORK I HAVE TO DO TODAY? WASTING MY TIME, YOU PIECE OF SHIT.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so I just grit my teeth. Like an impatient father, he soaps up my sensitive ass, rinses it, then cuts off the water.
“WHERE’S MY FUCKING TOWEL?”
“It’s probably on the floor covered in ass cum!” I blurt. He glares at me. In a split second, it dawns on me that I’m to fetch him a new towel, so I scurry out of the shower and bring him one.
I help him dry off, rub his beastly shoulders, kneel before him to get his legs.
“IT’S TIME FOR BED.”
He shoves past me and gets in bed, puts a pillow over his head, tunes me out.
I follow him into the bedroom, and ask meekly, “Do I get to sleep in the bed?”
He says, “YES, BUT DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME.”
I crawl into bed and lie on my side, breathing hard. I eke out sobbing noises.
Eventually I calm down and start breathing deeply. It’s 5:30 in the morning.
Finally, he reaches for me and gently gathers me up in his strong embrace.
I am so grateful.