By Kendra Holliday | March 3, 2013 at 3:36 pm
I should be making $60 right now.
Instead, I’m banging out this post and feeling very frustrated.
As most of you already know, I offer sex and relationship consulting.
Today I wasted time and money meeting someone for a no-call, no-show appointment.
It’s the 10th time in the past month this has happened to me.
I’ve left a warm bed and my lover to meet people who canceled at the last minute. I’ve left my daughter with friends so I could meet someone who suddenly can’t make it. I’ve put off friends for weeks so that I can meet strangers to talk about their problems, only to discover I’m the one with the problem, because I’m spinning my wheels and wasting my time.
I don’t know these people – they contact me and request consultations. I do my due diligence – I gather basic information and check in with them the day before to confirm, etc.
And still, I’m left high and dry.
I get pissed.
Then I find out that their grandmother died, their kid was in the ER, they had a heart attack, they got in a car accident, they came down with the flu, they had to leave town for an emergency, they’re very sorry, etc.
and then I feel like an asshole. A very confused asshole. Are they telling the truth? Are they fucking with me? I have no idea, I don’t know them. But they sure know a lot about me.
If everything went as planned this past month, I would have made the $600 I need for a special trip I’m taking with my daughter in two weeks. Instead, I’ll have to beg and borrow it.
I’m not sure what the fuck is going on lately – my consultation business used to work well for me. I love helping others, sharing my expertise, connecting people with the right resources.
But these days, it feels more like an energy and money drain, a burn, one step forward, one step back.
Someone told me that Mercury is in retrograde. According to The Old Farmer’s Almanac:
“Mercury’s retrograde periods can cause our plans to go awry. However, this is an excellent time to reflect on the past. Intuition is high during these periods, and coincidences can be extraordinary. In 2013, Mercury will be retrograde from February 23–March 17.”
My trip is scheduled for March 16-19.
Regardless of whether this funkiness is temporary or not, I’m putting forth a new cancellation policy. You can read it here.
I’ll try and figure out other ways to supplement my income. I’m a single mom – I don’t have a partner to fall back on. I have to do it all myself – pay my mortgage and bills, keep my shit together, make sure my daughter wants for nothing. My day job is great, but it only covers half of my expenses. I don’t mind working hard and keeping busy, but I need it to pay off.
Thanks for reading.